Obsessed Read online

  Imagining the possibilities of our future allowed satisfaction to come to life, washing away my earlier unease and filling my chest with a sense of pride. “This time it will be the right Sparrow. He’s good, but not good enough to do it all on his own.”

  “We’ll all have his back,” Reid said.

  “We’ll have everyone’s back. Chicago won’t be the same.”

  It would be better.

  The illegal world would still exist, only now the Sparrow organization had a new leader. Transitions were a dangerous time. It was up to the four of us and the capos we had in waiting to make this work.

  The day of reckoning was at hand.

  There were members of Allister’s old regime who wouldn’t take kindly to the coup. That was their fucking choice. Swear allegiance to the new king of Chicago or say goodbye to everything and everyone.

  In this life—as in war—there was no middle ground.

  Laurel

  Present day

  My entire body chilled in the darkness as Kader pulled me closer to his warmth. “I-I...” I couldn’t think straight much less speak. I was where—only moments earlier—I’d wanted to be. Now, I wasn’t certain of anything, even my next breath.

  What had he just said?

  “I don’t usually fail when I take a job,” Kader continued, his deep voice cutting through the thundering circulation thumping in my ears. Although he’d just told me that he’d taken a job to kill me, his cadence was calm and his volume soft. “I’ve made mistakes in my life, but I’ve learned to rely on my gut. You could say it’s my compass. That isn’t to imply that I do the good thing. I don’t view what I do or the assignments I accept through a good-versus-bad lens.”

  This was too much.

  Was he actually trying to rationalize taking a job to kill me?

  I pulled myself away. “This is what you do? You kill people? No...” My head began to shake as my volume rose. “You sleep with people and then kill them?” I lifted my hand between us until it came to rest over the soft cotton covering his wide chest. I wasn’t thinking about his no-touching rule. My only thought was getting away. Applying pressure, I pushed myself farther toward the wall.

  Away.

  There was nowhere I could go.

  I was within a concrete box, sandwiched between a cement-block wall and a man nearly twice my body mass.

  “No, that isn’t what I do,” Kader said as he reached for my hand, the one on his chest. Entwining our fingers, he lifted mine to his lips.

  What the hell?

  His actions were not in context with the words he’d spoken a few moments ago. I never took Kader for the hand-holding type. Hell, I was shocked he’d climbed back into bed with me after we’d...

  Made love was an inaccurate description. I’d asked him to take me and that was what he’d done. I asked for him and I’d gotten him.

  I’d wanted and needed to feel alive, to feel connected.

  Alive.

  My chest ached with the memory of Russ.

  Wrenching my hand away, I reached for the bedcovers and scooted farther away. Bending my legs beneath my body, I sat against the far wall using the blanket as my shield. The movement helped, yet I couldn’t concentrate. There was one dominating thought.

  Kader had been hired to kill me.

  The man who had just taken me—fucked me—was supposed to kill me.

  Silence descended upon the room, yet neither of us moved.

  “When you said,” I began, finally finding my voice, “that there was a price on my head and it had been accepted...” I took a deep breath. “You knew that to be true because you were the one who accepted the job.”

  “Yes.”

  Scenes over the last week replayed in my mind. “But that doesn’t make sense. You said you weren’t going to hurt me. That first night at the gathering you said if you had wanted to do me harm, I wouldn’t have been there.”

  “I haven’t lied to you.”

  “I don’t see how you have been truthful. Killing me and not harming me are polar opposites.”

  Kader let out a long breath. “If you want me to leave, I can sleep on the recliner.”

  Did I want him to leave?

  “I don’t know what I want.” That wasn’t entirely true. I wanted to go back to the illusion of safety. I would say that I wanted to go back to before last Friday, but that would mean not knowing Kader—the man hired to kill me.

  Come on, Laurel, that should be what you want.

  Instead of voicing any of that, I asked, “Will you explain what you do or what you did? Who hired you?” A new thought registered. “Do you think whoever it is also put a price on Russ?” New sobs grew in my chest at the memory of my partner, my friend, and my sometimes-lover dead on my bedroom floor.

  Kader’s hand patted the top of the blankets, coming closer to where I sat.

  “Come over here,” he called through the dark.

  “You said I can’t touch you.”

  “But I can touch you. Come here. I’ll tell you what I can.”

  “You never lied?” The question came between hiccups that my new round of tears had created.

  “No, Laurel. I was hired to kill you. I took the job because from the first time I saw your photo, I knew there was something about you. Fuck, there is still something about you. I can’t explain it. I took the job intending to complete it. I don’t fail. That’s my reputation.”

  My body trembled as I continued to clench the blanket over my breasts.

  Finally, his large palm found my knee. His fingers splayed. “That’s not my goal any longer. Even so, I will not fail.”

  Oh dear God.

  Kader’s grasp of my knee tightened. “I’m not going to fail, but I’m also not going to carry out the assignment as it was ordered. People hire me. I kill for a living. It’s a good living. You were right that the pit upstairs isn’t my standard either. I make a better-than-good living. It’s not always people. I also kill reputations, companies, and ideas.”

  “Like my formula?” I asked.

  “Yes, like that. I can hack into even the most advanced systems. I can breach firewalls like they’re tissue paper. I have an innate ability to understand languages. There isn’t much I can’t access. I’m hired for all kinds of jobs. In most cases, I don’t make contact with my target. I also don’t know who hires me.”

  I tried to swallow, but my mouth was dry. “Is that water bottle still here?” I asked.

  The mattress shifted until he was back with the bottle.

  I reached through the darkness, opened the cap, and quenched my thirst. Once I handed it back, I asked, “So what does that mean for me and the formula?”

  “It means that while I was hired, I’m my own boss. I answer to no one.” He exhaled. “I was hired to stop the research. I made the decision not to kill you before you ever saw me. That was why I offered you money, asked your price for the research. That payoff wasn’t from my employer. They weren’t willing to pay you. I was.”

  “Why?”

  The mattress shifted again. No longer holding my knee, Kader was beside me, leaning against the wall. “I have no fucking idea. I don’t. Sometimes I wonder if we...if there could be something...” He let out another long breath. “What I mean is that I determine destinies. Laurel, when I saw your picture, I think I knew.” His fingers again splayed over my knee, resting on my thigh. “I knew that I would accept the assignment of your destiny because I couldn’t allow the job to go to someone else.”

  Warmth radiated from his touch.

  Slowly, I placed my hand over his. His turned until we were palm to palm.

  “You’re not going to kill me?”

  “I’m not...” The sound of a scoff filled the air. “...although, I’m beginning to think you’ll be the death of me before this is over.”

  Leaning toward his shoulder, I shook my head. “No. I don’t want to lose anyone else.”

  I wasn’t certain how long we sat in the dark. Over time,
his sleeve dampened with my on-again, off-again tears. It was as he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me toward the pillows that I gave in to the warmth of his hold. The clean aroma of his recently showered skin, combined with the lingering scent of our union, created a reassuring scent that permeated the musty basement, settling over us as I curled closer.

  It wasn’t until he woke me later that I realized I’d been touching him. Not him, per se. There was a cotton barrier between us, yet he hadn’t told me to stop. In many ways, he seemed to encourage it, such as following me to the wall when I refused to go to him.

  Kader’s fingers splayed over my skin, pulling me closer. In the darkness, his lips found mine. Softer than before, he was no longer staking his claim or pillaging a foreign land. This was different—reassuring. The declaration had been made.

  I was his for the taking.

  He didn’t need to tell me what he wanted. The hardness of his cock against my tummy wordlessly revealed his intentions. In unison as if choreographed, we moved as one until this man who controlled destinies was above me, his body now my shield. His lips and teeth were his tools as he worked me higher and higher.

  We weren’t in a basement.

  My life wasn’t at risk.

  We were flying above the clouds.

  From sleep to ecstasy, the road was long and strenuous.

  Perspiration covered my skin as I held tightly to the arms and shoulders above me. I clinched the soft cotton of his shirt in my clenched fists as we became one. My back arched while my shouts echoed off the walls. As he had the first time, Kader stilled, allowing me to adjust. Unlike before, my body recalled his length and girth, giving less resistance to his invasion.

  “You feel so fucking good.” His proclamation sent a warm breath over my skin and a smile to my face.

  “I do.” It wasn’t a question but a statement.

  Slowly at first, he began to move. Each thrust was controlled as my nails clung to his shirt and we found a rhythm. This wasn’t a race to the top. It was a marathon—no, an Ironman contest. With every touch, each kiss, and the chorus of sounds, I was expending every ounce of energy. It was all-consuming. My mind and my body were focused on the man making love to me.

  I wasn’t certain how many times I cried out as my body convulsed around him or my teeth sank into the material covering his shoulder as I tried unsuccessfully to stifle my shrieks of pleasure. All I knew was that by the time the muscles beneath that shirt pulled taut and Kader came undone, I was shattered beyond repair. The only reason I was not in shards on the floor was the man holding me. Breaking our union, Kader settled beside me and wrapped me in his arms, gluing my broken world back together.

  I was too tired to think of anything else. For a moment in time, my life wasn’t in shambles, my life’s work wasn’t in jeopardy, my friend wasn’t dead, and I wasn’t in danger. His even breaths lulled me back to sleep.

  A shrill ring ripped through the darkness, waking us both and splintering our reprieve.

  Before I could say a word, Kader bolted from the bed.

  “Fuck.”

  It was the last thing I heard as he hurried from the bedroom.

  Kader

  The alarm sounded, echoing through the room, originating from my smart watch. It meant something had changed on my surveillance feeds. I’d bolted from the bedroom, flinging open the door until it bounced back against the wall. Using my fingers, I raked back my untethered hair and rushed toward my computer setup.

  What the fuck was wrong with me?

  That was a rhetorical question.

  Literally, I had many answers.

  I needed to step up my game. Fuck, I shouldn’t have been asleep.

  Turning off the alarm, I’d noticed the time: 10:10...in the goddamned morning.

  When had I ever slept for that long?

  I couldn’t come up with one instance, not even when I was home on my ranch and not working an assignment. Hell no. There were too many things to do on the ranch, too many possibilities. Usually when I was there, I was up before the sun. Watching it rise over the distant mountains was one of the few normal activities I enjoyed. Fly-fishing in the stream that ran through my property or big-game hunting were also possibilities I enjoyed when I wasn’t locked away in my office monitoring possible jobs as well as my investments.

  Reaching for the mouse, a quick movement of my wrist brought the computer screens to life as I pulled up the big chair and settled upon the edge. Although the monitors were beginning to light, I wasn’t seeing what was before me. Instead, my thoughts were filled with the reason I’d slept so late.

  My mind uncharacteristically shifted from my work to Laurel.

  When the alarm sounded, she’d also been asleep. The simple realization amazed me.

  Hell, I’d told her the truth about who I am and what I do, and yet she’d remained. It wasn’t as if she could unlock the padlock at the top of the stairs, but she hadn’t even tried. She hadn’t gone out to the recliner or sofa. She’d stayed, her warm curves curled beside me as her even breaths filled my ears, sending tiny puffs over my skin. It was the proximity that had prompted me to wake her sometime during the night.

  I wasn’t certain if I was infatuated with her because she stayed—or more infatuated, I should say—or if I was simply shocked.

  What woman stays in bed with a professed killer?

  Hell, not only stayed in bed but slept, fucked, and slept again.

  Pushing the thoughts of her—her body, her noises, her scent, her soft skin beneath my touch, and even her tears—out of my head was impossible. Those mental images would be there for the rest of my life.

  For a lingering moment, I had an interesting thought.

  No matter how this assignment concluded, Laurel Carlson had given me something I’d never previously had. Since my rebirth, I’d accumulated what was necessary to live in a manner I found acceptable. Through the years of determining destinies, I’d earned both money and power. Those commodities allowed me a lifestyle I preferred, one of seclusion. To that end, I owned over 1,200 acres of freedom in nowhere Montana. Other than a few trusted seasonal ranch hands and a well-paid manager, my closest neighbors were elk, deer, antelope, and moose.

  Solitude had been my goal. That ranch was my haven.

  Yet none of those accomplishments gave me what Laurel had given me—and in only a few days.

  In a short period of time, she’d given me memories—pleasant memories involving a person, not a successful assignment or the isolation of seclusion.

  As thoughts of her spun around my head, a smile threatened my cold stare.

  Laurel Carlson had given me...memories, something I’d never before been willing to acknowledge that I lacked.

  Shaking my head at the revelation, I pushed the sleeves of my t-shirt up to my elbows and forced myself to focus. Taking inventory of the screens and subsections before me, I searched. It would take a major change in one or more of the locations to set off the alarm. A person could also set it off if facial recognition occurred.

  I isolated the feed responsible for the alarm. It was Laurel’s lab at the university. Apparently, the lights were no longer out.

  “Well, look who’s back,” I said aloud to myself.

  Shit, it wasn’t only that. There was someone in her house.

  Damn neighbor.

  Laurel had said they had an agreement. Mrs. Beeson better watch out. Borrowing sugar would place her fingerprints and DNA there and get her more than she bargained for.

  The sound of a closing door, refocused my attention to the other side of the Plexiglas wall.

  The open bedroom door obstructed my view of the hallway. Nevertheless, it wasn’t difficult to infer that Laurel had also awakened and was now out of the bedroom and in the bathroom.

  I spent a few more minutes taking inventory of the people present on the fifth floor at the university. There seemed to be extra traffic and attention to both Laurel’s and Cartwright’s offices.

  It m
ade me wonder what those individuals believed to have happened to the good doctors. Placing an ear bud in my ear, I turned on the volume.

  My empty stomach didn’t bother me as I worked. I’d often go a day or two without eating. And then I remembered the woman down the hallway. She couldn’t afford to miss too many meals. As it was, we hadn’t had anything after lunch yesterday. That was almost twenty hours ago.

  There wasn’t anything happening on the feeds that demanded my immediate attention. Besides, everything was recorded for later viewing. Kicking off my sleeping pants, I stepped into blue jeans, donned socks and boots.

  Retrieving my black coat, I pushed my arms into the sleeves. With my gun in the band of my jeans, I started toward the door when I stopped.

  Shit.

  I wasn’t used to reporting to anyone, but then again, I didn’t want Laurel to come out and realize I was gone. Changing my direction, I headed down the hallway. The sound of water coming from the shower was like instant Viagra to my dick.

  No longer were my images of her sensual body conjured by my imagination. I had life experiences. Each and every memory was coming at me at record speed. All it would take was a twist of the knob.

  No.

  We’d established that boundary. If I expected her to honor it, I needed to also.

  Standing taller, I swallowed and making a fist, knocked on the door. “Laurel?”

  No response.

  Reaching for the knob, I found myself wrestling with another unusual conundrum. There was no doubt she was messing with my mind. I have broken into and entered secure establishments, businesses, and residences without reservation. I’d placed cameras without one single thought of morality. And now I was considering if it would be wrong to open the door.

  I shook my head and pounded louder. “Laurel.”